It's Time to Forgive, But How?

Does your mind keep thinking about the person or people who did you wrong? Who treated you unfairly or just outright hurt you? It's natural for you to want to stop thinking about them altogether, but you probably can't seem to get them out of your head and get the necessary anger management techniques.

Forgiveness always seemed confusing and difficult for me. My purpose for writing this is to make forgiveness understandable and simple for you and to offer you anger management techniques to let go of any stuck emotional energy that's holding you down from being the "total you". In this I'll give you a simple and powerful exercise that will lighten your mind and return you to the state of happiness that you want... but first you need to stop and be aware of why this is really going on within you. What is the deeper meaning of this pain?

Forgiveness is one of the anger management techniques we can choose to let go of the past so that we can love ourselves in the Now. Growing up, I would always hear the pastor at my church say, "Forgive your brother and sister to be free of your suffering", and I would think, "Easy for you to say buddy!" I later realized that the power in forgiveness is to first understand we actually attracted the painful experience to help us see where we believe we're separate from God. The second is to "get" that the act of forgiveness doesn't need to happen with the person who hurt you. You can forgive them and yourself in the solitude of your heart.

I often thought that it must be extremely difficult for someone who has experienced rape, abuse, or a traumatic experience to just forgive the other person. But over the years, I've come to realize that forgiveness and anger management techniques are not always a one shot deal. Imagine forgiveness comes in slices like a pizza. Each time the pain comes up, you go within and forgive that person and yourself, however much you can in that moment. By doing this you take a slice of that pain away, like a taking one slice of pizza away. If, later on, the pain comes back... realize that there's another slice left and release all that you can in that moment. I've written about my recent personal transformation with forgiveness and I think you'll find this idea to be helpful and supportive in release any pain you're feeling.

Recently I decided that what I really wanted was anger management techniques to allow me to be positive and outgoing with an optimistic view towards my daily life, but everyday my mind would reflect back to a few people who I was angry with. All I wanted was to just forget about them and never think about or speak to them again. Yet every day they would come up in my mind! I would constantly see them on Facebook "top friends", and then I started having negative dreams about these people while I was sleeping. Can you relate?

After a few treacherous months of "sinking thinking" and holding on to my inner battles, I finally was able to use anger management techniques that helped me make the shift within myself and let go of my hurt and suffering. Take this practice into your own daily life and be gentle with yourself as you begin to let go of any pain or resentment your holding within.

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