Releasing Our Negative Emotions

Whenever we feel overwhelmed by our feelings or that we are ready to explode, our tendency is to push those emotions down in the hope that they will go away. Even though our history shows us anger can't be contained indefinitely, we hold back for fear of upsetting others or from fear of negative consequences. Then surprise, surprise, those feelings come back to be expressed - usually at the worst possible time and in the worst possible way.

Feelings that we perceive as negative or inappropriate are coming up to be healed and will not be ignored, so we may as well address them with anger management techniques. It may be necessary to do a process to release these 'negative' feelings n a manageable and healthy way and I've listed some below:

1. Find a quiet space and give yourself a time limit to really feel the anger management techniques- perhaps 10 minutes. Really allow that feeling to peak and express themselves. It will reach a peak and once it has, then literally allow yourself to drop the feelings, to step out of them. Thank it for what it has taught you and get back in the driver seat. Take ownership of your anger management techniques and decide you are now going to focus on feeling better. Because you have given the feeling expression you will actually find it easier to focus on better feeling thoughts.

2. Identify the negative feeling and recall the first time you felt it. For example if it's a feeling of being criticized or judged, remember the first time you felt that way. Your subconscious mind will come up with a memory easily so let it. Go back to that time (usually a time in your childhood between the ages of 0 and 7) and see what the situation was. Use anger management techniques to be in control.

See how you feel about now. Does it have the same intensity? Can you feel a shift? If not repeat the anger management techniques a couple more times. (This is a great process to do with a trusted friend.)

3. Write out your negative feelings. Let yourself really express them. Do not hold back anything. No one is going to see what you write so give yourself permission to say exactly what you want to say with no judgment, because judgment is not part of anger management techniques. You will know when you have said everything you need to say because your hand will stop writing. You will feel a sense of release and relief and you will find it easier to get back into a better feeling place.
You need to make a commitment to yourself to let go of your negative feelings. If you feel ready to release the emotion or if it's something that's just a general anxiety, stress or anger, then the above processes will help you to move forward in positive ways.
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