The Danger in Anger

With a dagger in your hand or a loaded gun nearby, anger is particularly dangerous. It's one thing to slam doors, throw plates or simply yell, scream or have a temper tantrum. It's an altogether different level of concern sufficient to involve an anger management course when weapons are involved.

Anger itself is not a dangerous emotion; it's the decisions that arise from an angry mind that become dangerous. Any person who is angry has choices about how to deal with that emotion. Unfortunately, almost by definition, anger is not rational, so committing one's self on the spot to take an anger management course is almost always unlikely.

In addition the decisions made while angry are not thought out and do not include an anger management course as even a passing thought.

Although consequences may be clear about what would happen should a person do this or that out of anger, that angry mind is not clear, and often does not incorporate consequences into its immediate calculations. That impulsive, reactivity makes anger dangerous, especially should a weapon be available nearby. An anger management course option never even “gets to first base in the angry person's mind.

Anger is not something that can be turned on and off by conscious choice. Anger is triggered by deep-seated internal thought patterns activated by environmental situations. However, anger can be managed. An anger management course is taught almost everywhere throughout the nation with the purpose of teaching the ways and means of understanding, managing and, in some cases, diminishing, the anger response.

Most of these courses focus on how the event itself is not the cause of our anger, but rather what we tell ourselves about the event that triggers the anger. This is useful information, and many people complete an anger management course with a much better understanding of its dynamics and tools to use to help manage, diminish and in some cases completely abate anger.

This is not to say that there are times when anger is an appropriate response...for there are. But, when anger becomes violent, it has gone too far. Most people in an anger management course are court mandated as a result of domestic violence, which is brought on by the rise of anger.

Anger rises for two main reasons. The first is unmet expectations, desires or wants. The second is loss. Un-met expectations, desires and wants could actually be placed in the loss category, for when we do not get what we want, or when our expectations or dreams are shattered, it is a loss. It is sometimes said that underneath anger is sorrow, and sorrow is an appropriate response to loss. But, if a person is culturally conditioned to deny or avoid the feelings of sorrow, then anger, which is often more acceptable than sorrow, is expressed. If anger is not expressed, if it is denied or stuffed down inside, it can fester. It is said that depression is anger turned inwards. At this point dealing with anger and its by-product issues almost always requires an anger management course, and other psychological and emotional interventions.

Anger, regardless of its origins, must be expressed in some way, preferably a healthy way.... Here are some ideas for expressing anger in appropriate, healthy ways... Strenuous physical activity such as running, biking, working out with weights, push-ups, sit-ups or a game of racquetball. Ironically, anger can be used to increase physical health through this behavior, especially when it is part of a regimen recommended in an anger management course.
As long as the danger is taken out of anger, it is safe enough, can be released, and managed, appropriately when rational thinking can prevail in an anger management course.

http://www.openmindcounseling.com.

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