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Anger in the Workplace:
Warning Signs for a Teen with Anger Problems
parents recognize that their teen has a problem
with anger management. They feel their
teen needs to develop anger management
skills, or needs to find some kind of anger management
counseling that will help
them get along better in life -- in school, at work,
with a parent, with siblings, and others. In some cases,
professionals may have diagnosed a teenager with
a “conduct disorder”, or “oppositional
defiant disorder” beginning in adolescence. This
site is to help parents be aware of specific
warning signs that may indicate if a teenager
has an anger management problem more significant
than what is to normally be expected.
Types of Anger
The natural response
to fear is to fight it or avoid it. When confronted
with fear, animals and humans both go into “fight
or flight”, “violence or silence”,
or “gun or run”. They engage in the conflict,
or they withdraw. Though many parents may equate “adolescent
with the “fight-violence-gun,” uncontrollable
rage, parents must also recognize that anger may
be “turned inwards” in the “flight-silence-run”
mode, which can often times be as dangerous, if not
more so, than expressed
The author of this information is a therapist at a program
for struggling teens. As a therapist working
at a youth program, he has learned, observed and verified
the following trends. Generally, anger falls into three
main categories: 1) Fight, 2) Flight, or 3) Pretend
to be “Flighting”, while finding indirect
ways to Fight. Most teens with anger management
problems will go to either extreme of fight or flight.
They tend to become
aggressive, mean, and hostile, or they withdraw
into themselves and become extremely silent, silently
stubborn, and depressed.
“The Fighters”: Teen Anger Turned to Aggression
“The fighters” are pretty simple to recognize.
aggressive. Many times, the characteristics
of teens with anger management
problems are included in the professional diagnosis
for “Conduct Disorder” or an “Oppositional
Defiant Disorder (ODD)”. Some of the warning signs
in the following list are taken from the criteria for
professional diagnosis (click here for more information).
Others are additional common signs of anger management
problems for teens that are “fighters”.
- Openly and often defiant
- Often demeans or swears
directly to parent or others in authority positions
- Has left holes in walls
and doors from violent outbursts
- Loud and yelling
- Frequently vocalizes
- Makes threats
- Seems to have “emotional
diarrhea”, and “lets it all out, all the time”
fits of rage (usually these “teenage
temper tantrums” are used as threats to get
Difficulty accepting a “No” answer
- Does not follow rules
- Often feels rules are
“stupid”, or don’t apply
- Destroys property
- Physically cruel to people
- Initiates fights with
- Seriously violates rules
(at home, in school, or society in general)
This list does not list
every possible warning sign for the “fighters”.
The teen “Fighters” have anger
management problems when the problems are creating
an unsafe situation for themselves, for others, or for
property around them. If animals and/or people are the
focus of the anger
and aggression, the problem is extremely critical
to address. Teens who have abused animals or
people as children, or as teens, are at a higher
risk of becoming a threat to society than those who
have not. Where these warning signs seem to be a part
of daily life, intervention is strongly suggested. Intervention
can be through anger management counseling,
an anger management program, or a program
dedicated and experienced in working with teenagers
with anger management problems.
“The ‘Flighters’”: Teen Anger Turned to Passive
The “Flighters” can also be fairly simple
to recognize. They are passive. They do not fight back
when confronted. Many of their characteristics may coincide
with the diagnosis of depression. Some of these warning
signs are taken from the professional diagnosis
for depression, and others are taken from learning,
observations and experience.
- Tends to spend a lot
of time alone
- Seems to hold anger in
- Seems depressed
- Has difficulty expressing
- Seems to have very little
- Seems withdrawn
- Extremely passive, to
the point of getting “walked over” by others
- May simply “go
along” with whatever, even when it is a poor decision
- Does not engage in much
- May blame self unnecessarily
- Deals with difficult
emotions by “cutting” the emotions off
- Holds anger in, then
“blows up” suddenly and violently
- May punch holes in walls
or kick doors, when “the last straw drops”
May be seen as a “loner”
- May have few friends
- Seems “emotionally
- Physical problems may
include upset stomach, muscle aches, backaches, frequent headaches, or other
physical symptoms from “holding it in”.
are in danger of destroying themselves emotionally from within. The “flighters”
are like a balloon being constantly blown into, with no release valve. When
they explode, their anger may be violent, and may lead to harming themselves,
harming others, or destroying property. Internalized anger is potentially as
destructive to a teenager as aggressive anger.
Teen Anger Silently Planning Revenge
Perhaps the most difficult to detect, the “Pretenders” follow an
anger style that seems to be calm on the surface, but is raging, scheming, and
planning underneath. They are passive-aggressive. In its mild form, this
is the upset waiter who goes in the back room and spits in the demanding client’s
soup. In its extreme form, these are the teen gunmen of Columbine and
other school shootings. These teens do not directly confront the anger
as a “Fighter” would do. They will be passive and appear to accept
what is said, and then will disregard what is said to do their own thing. They
are sneaky. Often, they may be unnoticed. While they are giving a person a hug,
they are also stabbing them in the back. They lack the courage to be direct,
and perfect the skills to be deceitful. They know where the “back door”
to revenge is, and will use it often.
They will give the appearance
of a “Flighter”. The list of “flighter” characteristics
also applies to them. Additional items to look for with “Pretenders”
are on the following list.
- Sneaky behaviors
- Tends to sabotage
- Often gets caught in
- Inconsistency between
what is said and what is done
- May be very good at
- May not admit mistakes
- Tends to avoid direct
conflict, while creating problems in other areas
These warning signs are
a few to look for the “Pretenders”. Teens who try to manage
their anger through the “Pretender” style are as potentially dangerous
to others and themselves as the other style. Parents cannot underestimate the
“Pretender” style because the danger does not seem to be that of
the aggressive “Fighter”.
Many parents recognize
that their teen has a problem with anger management. They
know their teen needs to develop anger management skills,
or needs to find some kind of anger management counseling that
will help them get along better in life -- in school, at work, with a parent,
with siblings, and other. As has been shown, anger comes in three main styles
-- Fighter, Flighter, and Pretender -- and each style has the potential to create
big problems for the teen, families, and society in general. This site
has offered specific warning signs that may indicate if a teenager has
an anger management problem more significant than what is to normally
be expected. When necessary, professional and competent intervention is recommended.
Diamond Ranch Academy
The demanding, complicated, and time-crunched lifestyles that are so common today make many people feel like they are riding a swirling merry-go-round, and it won't slow down enough---much less stop---so they can get off. That's a major reason so many people vow they need to simplify their lives. That's really just another way of saying they need to do a better job of managing their stress.
Stress management was not taught when today's adults were in school. Come to think of it, it is not being taught in most schools now.. Another subject that many adults today wish they could have studied---or even majored in---is anger management. That's because so many people are struggling with stress that leads to uncontrolled anger.
It is blatantly obvious that uncontrolled anger damages people socially, but it's also been proved by scientific research that it can and often does have adverse effects on physical health. Ailments such as high blood pressure, heart problems, and chronic fatigue often stem from out-of-control stress and anger. Psychological problems also arise, such as depression, deep remorse and low self-esteem.
The term "short fuse" is slang for anger, but there are good reasons why it has lasted long enough to become a familiar part of our language. "Short fuse" refers a fuse on an explosive device. The shorter the fuse, the less time there is, and re-thinking is not an option. That's why in movies the person who lights a short fuse is usually shown running as fast as he can to get away. The longer the fuse, the more time you have between lighting it and the bang. The longer the fuse, the more time you have to re-think what you're doing and even to snuff out the fuse t so there is no bang. Anger workshops and anger management classes focus on teaching "long fuse" methods and practices that teach alternatives to "flash-bang" behaviors.
Various organizations are now offering anger workshops to teach methods to control stress and anger. One major plus is that these workshops is that they are designed not only for working professionals, but also for parents, teen-agers, and children who find it hard to control their anger. In these anger workshops the goals are to help people understand the negative effects
of anger and to teach them ways to cope with stress and anger problems in their lives.
Anger workshops also provide solutions to deal with failures, setbacks and daily frustrations in order to keep stress and anger at bay. These anger workshops are not one-way lectures, but are designed to use interactive and innovative ways to explain the ill effects of anger and ways to manage it. Those who suffer themselves and cause it for others because of their "short fuse" behaviors can take the first step towards changing their lives by enrolling in an anger workshop. And they can also begin change the lives of those around them for the better.
Anger is a dangerous emotion that, if left uncontrolled, can wreak havoc in people's lives. "People" is a collective term, a plural word meaning more than one person. You knew that, but it bears repeating to emphasize that anger affects the person who is blowing his/her stack and the person(s) having to take the brunt of it. And as long as we are looking at word meanings, let's consider some of the terms---all negative---often used to describe a "fly off the handle" angry person: jerk, nutcase, brute, dork, bully and tyrant.
No people would ever say to themselves "I think it would be so cool if people avoided me because I'm such a bombastic jerk." But one of the characteristics of uncontrolled anger is that it can blind the person who is acting out so they don't--- or can't--- see themselves as others do. In fact, not unless and until the person screaming at the top of his lungs finally begins to wake up to the fact that he or she needs more self-control that there is a reasonable chance for making lasting, positive changes. After a person decides to get help, the next step is to consider where to go to get it. More and more people these days are choosing an online anger class to learn ways to manage their anger.
Why an anger class, and why online?
First, anger classes and anger courses are mushrooming because of the increasing stress in our society. More and more people need help managing their stress and their anger. Another reason large numbers of people are enrolling in online anger classes is there are more classes available. The number of online anger management classes being designed, developed and put online continues to grow.
Being online means that the courses offer more options and flexibility to participants than traditional classes in which people are required to sit in rows and listen passively to a teacher lecture. Online anger classes are interactive, inclusive, and designed by experts specifically for online delivery. They do not require a massive technological set-up, and can be taken anywhere there is a computer that can access the Internet, Whether late at night, early in the morning, or any time in between an online anger class is available.
These online anger classes are designed for parents, teenagers, and sometimes as part of professional development activities at work. Some online anger classes offer a certificate upon completion. Sometimes, judges require people facing charges to attend anger management classes, and to show proof of their attendance. In these cases, judges typically accept the certificate as proof the defendant followed the court's orders. Whether an anger management class is voluntary or required, the participant gets the same course content and the same level of support and encouragement from the course instructors and facilitators. The goal is the same: to empower the participants to manage their anger so they can start down the road of self-control and reconciliation.
If you have decided that an anger management class would be helpful for you, consider taking on online anger class, and the sooner the better Online Anger Class
Anger management, anger courses, online anger class, classes anger
An old song says that "life is just a bowl of cherries." If the tune, musical style and cutesy lyrics didn't identify the song as being several decades old, the point of view of it would. The song came from of a time when optimism and positive feelings were common in popular music. In contrast, many of us today would say our "bowl" is full of frenzied daily routines, irritating complications, unreasonable deadlines, and increasing stress. Those who find a way to be generally happy, centered, and positive are few indeed. But those who are searching for ways to control stress, and the anger that can stem from it, are increasing every day. It's no surprise that classes in stress and anger management are springing up all over the place, and the supply can't seem to keep up with the demand.
Anger management classes teach individuals to control their anger by harnessing their emotional energy and channeling it in a constructive manner. Depending on the specific goals, the anger management classes rely on a variety of specially designed techniques and methods such as meditation, yoga, and practice in developing emotional intelligence. The classes also provide study materials and related resources.
Another kind of class that is growing in popularity by leaps and bounds is online anger management classes. When you think about it, it's easy to see why this is the case. The online anger management classes teach the same valuable course content as traditional classes, but offer much more flexible schedules. Participants can log on to the online anger management class anywhere they have a computer with access to the Internet. The time element is just as flexible, because the online anger class can be accessed 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
The online anger classes are designed specifically for online use, and they are taught and facilitated by qualified instructors and facilitators. The instructors lead students through the course content, often using video, interactive exercises, and relevant Internet resources. Some of the exercises give the participants the opportunity to interact online with each other. The facilitators are available to help students with problems using the online features and other computer-related issues. So just because participants may be in a room by themselves when they access the online anger classes, they are by no means alone.
If you have problems with anger management and are fortunate enough to recognize that, online anger management classes may be the answer you've been looking for: high quality course content, flexible schedule, and online interaction with the instructors, facilitators and other participants.
What's not to like? Consider enrolling today.